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Monday, January 27, 2014

We are fleeing from the high maintenance girl


I was chatting with an OB I had not seen in a while. He asked when I was planning to get married, and I confessed that I am determined to put a ring on it this year. “I hope your woman is not a high-maintenance girl,” my friend said. “Those ones are not marriage-material; they should be avoided like a scandal!”
It struck me that I had heard the expression “high-maintenance girl” (hereafter called HMG) before but didn’t have a true picture. So, I run to my Facebook friends for elucidation, and gosh the things they said about HMGs!

My colleague Daudi even extracted a meaning for me from urban dictionary. It says a HMG is one who has expensive taste (on the man’s account, of course!), is constantly concerned about her appearance, feels she is hotter than most girls, and usually judges others based on outward appearance.

This was put in proper perspective by Herbert who said the HMG expected her man to have an exclusive weekend budget to the tune of millions because she has to shop at high-end places like Forest Mall, go for a Shs200,000-movie at The Hub, tell you to park at some posh salon and wait on her while the hairdresser works magic on her hair, does her manicure, pedicure, massage, and facial makeover. Meanwhile, you are still waiting for her!

Then, Lauryn said the quickest way to spot a HMG is to look at how high her heels are: “If they are past two inches, run for your life!” It’s with these filthy-expensive spike heels that she announces her presence as they clang on the tiles and make heads turn.

Even more, a HMG never holds one phone for long. Peter says when she asks if it is okay to give away her I-phone to her “Baby Sis” because she heard the Samsung S4 takes better pictures, she is the one!
When KFC, which sells chicken in bucket-fulls hit town, HMGs immediately dumped other chicken hangouts for KFC. “To them,” says Dan, “the chicken from other restaurants is usually diseased!”
In short, according to Kenneth, the HMG is one who “takes more money out of your wallet than you can put in!”

Interestingly, men love hanging out with these girls even when they pay through the nose for their company. Yet, they avoid them when looking for wives. Most girls that are labelled by the press as “beautiful but unlucky” are often HMGs.

“Many men would really love to hang around a HMG but when the marriage equation comes in, it becomes a different situation altogether,” Dan explains. “You probably want to hang around with this suave chic, but deep inside you are thinking that if you got married and you hadn’t built a house, she would want you to rent a posh flat or upscale house of Shs2m a month.”

Miriam also has an inkling why HMGs cannot make wives: “They usually look good all the time, the reason you can never eat supper at home since she can’t wash the dishes.”

Sound off : Does being high maintenance necessarily mean not marriage material?
“That is just something girls use to set a standard for who should approach them. We just play with the man’s ego and confidence. Even when they get married, they try to maintain that standard. We should remember though that when a girl loves a man, they usually are not materialistic. There is a possibility of marrying a relatively low standard man. If love is not the reason for marriage, though, money shall talk then.
Bridget Bamulinde, Data Entrant, MTN

“They need money to be happy, always hard to please. Basically annoying. I would say typical high maintenance women are not marriage material. However, there are women who are high maintenance at their own expense (the financially independent).
Agnes Akello, Statistician 

“They are definitely marriage material, if you can afford them. And all guys deserve one because she motivates you to earn. Usually, such girls are actually capable of taking care of themselves. Because if you want something, you will earn it. People that judge them are those that get comfortable living the low life. They only want to live the life she deserves.
Sheila Atukei, University student 

--Saturday Monitor, January 25, 2014